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Successful child rearing is an essential skill for any parent, for most of us this skill is handed down from our own parents and society in general. In real terms this means that rather than relying on any formal instruction to help us, we bring up our children using skills based largely upon common sense and a willingness to do our best. These methods are, by-and-large, successful in everyday situations. However, when it comes to more difficult aspects of developing skills in our children, we need something more dependable than good will. Applied Behaviour Analysis, proven behavioural principles offers just that. Aimed at improving people's lives in ways that they or their carers feel important, it includes a variety of methods and techniques which can be used to promote, decrease, or maintain skills for daily living.. Most of what I have learned about Autism and other conditions has come from reading and studying, most of all wanting to know and learn. And educate myself because of my kids..
I have found myself asking when are the obsessions and rituals going to change? And what next? Aspergers kids have been known to withdraw more from socialising when they become teenagers, some are lucky to be able to move on and be able to overcome fears, especially in social scenes. I suppose a lot depends on the individual, and also what interventions are used. Unfortunately some kid's don't get access to proper facilities and lack of resources in some area's unable them to improve necessary social skills.. That seems to be the case where I live.
I think behaviour in Kids with Special Needs is a challenge in itself. I myself have learned to create different ways of coping with my kids. The difficult thing I have found is both my kids have totally different behavioural patterns, obsessions , rituals and personalities. Sometimes it's very hard to try and deal with each child especially when they both require attention at the same time. When arriving home from school, my two kids are very hyper and they both want to tell you something that has happened at school, I wish I had two lots of ears so I could listen to what they were both saying at the same time. For my Chloe getting in from school is a time when all hell brakes loose and my eldest daughter Katie run's for cover to escape violent outbursts from her sister. These outburst usually occur when she has had a bad day at school. We put it down to overload. Katie would manage to have a conversation when Chloe is tucked up in bed for the night.
Coping through the Tantrums and Outbursts
(not easy)
This a very frustrating time for any Parent, Carer, Grandparent, and the siblings
of the family..
Being in a public setting is a challenge, at the local shopping centre, either
to many people around or too noisy or perhaps the sizes of the shops themselves
all can pose a problem when wanting to carry out tasks which we all take for
granted. But having a child with Autism makes the simplest of tasks impossible
in some cases. We ourselves have been asked "why cant she stay at home
then we can enjoy ourselves for once" Which has been a typical comment
made by one of my children, about their sister. Another comment used is why?
is she always screaming and crying and why? does she always want to watch the
same T.V programme, the usual answer is because she is obsessive an ritualistic,
and cant help what she is doing. It is a difficult time for Siblings. The above
questions are frequently asked by my daughter, who's sister is under diagnosis
for an autistic spectrum disorder..
We also have a son who is diagnosed with
severe A.D.H.D, Tourettes Syndrome/Tics and newly diagnosed O.C.D as well as
an Autistic Spectrum Disorder. He can be very off putting when we are having
visitors at our home, because he cant control his noises, and can be very moody
and hard to deal with at times. Especially when we are out at the supermarket,
he likes to run up and down the aisles, and we always know where he is because
of his noises, we do get people staring at him, of which he is also aware of.
But he doesn't care what people think when he is enjoying himself. We have found
that in our local area people can be ignorant and see him as a nuisance, mostly
because they have no knowledge or simply don't want to know. Although we do
find ourselves telling him to calm down but he cant always do this..
Just below I have put some information, about my daughter Chloe who is under diagnosis for an Autistic Spectrum Disorder,
This page is an important part of my
website, because I think that behaviour difficulties, with children, with conditions
mentioned on the site vary,from child to child. I would like to talk about my
daughter Chloe, she has been under diagnosis for an Autistic Spectrum Disorder
now since 1999. It all started back when she was 3yrs. As a baby she was the
most demanding baby, anyone could have had. She constantly cried (This started
from birth) and continues till now..
She was overdue, I was 41 weeks when I had her, but I wasn't able to see her
straight after her birth, like normally the baby is placed on your stomach,
then the bonding process starts, which is a very special time. I later found
out 20 minutes later that she was not breathing properly, and this was known
as a shock birth. Eventually my Chloe was handed to me and I was just so glad
that everything was okay and I was allowed to see my baby at last.. But I found
it difficult to understand why she didn't stop crying. The doctor said that
it was because it was a shock birth and she will settle in 72 hours or so?How
wrong could he have been. I found that feeding her was the most challenging
time, and trying to hold and cuddle her was difficult as well. I just plodded
along and hoped it was a phase she would grow out of. It was especially difficult
when she was around 12 months of age when we had family members visit with their
kid's, Chloe just didn't acknowledge them. And when her cousins wanted to play
with her she would just act as if they weren't there. I would sit down and try
and get into a conversation with them, Chloe had a dislike to this. The funny
thing was that I think that was the only time Chloe ever came to me for cuddles
and would sit on my knee for the whole time my family visited. If anyone was
to approach Chloe she would hide away pressing herself tightly to me. Without
ever looking to see who was there. After my family left she would climb down
and start to play again as if nothing had happened. Her behaviour has always
been a challenge in itself. After all the problems I had encountered with her
she was referred to a paedatrition for investigation. After that she had some
assessments done by a psychologist, and then a speech therapist. She is still
seeing the specialist now, till we can find out what the problem is and sort
it..(One day soon )
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