Behaviour & Management
how do we deal with it ?

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Successful child rearing is an essential skill for any parent, for most of us this skill is handed down from our own parents and society in general. In real terms this means that rather than relying on any formal instruction to help us, we bring up our children using skills based largely upon common sense and a willingness to do our best. These methods are, by-and-large, successful in everyday situations. However, when it comes to more difficult aspects of developing skills in our children, we need something more dependable than good will. Applied Behaviour Analysis, proven behavioural principles offers just that. Aimed at improving people's lives in ways that they or their carers feel important, it includes a variety of methods and techniques which can be used to promote, decrease, or maintain skills for daily living.. Most of what I have learned about Autism and other conditions has come from reading and studying, most of all wanting to know and learn. And educate myself because of my kids..

I have found myself asking when are the obsessions and rituals going to change? And what next? Aspergers kids have been known to withdraw more from socialising when they become teenagers, some are lucky to be able to move on and be able to overcome fears, especially in social scenes. I suppose a lot depends on the individual, and also what interventions are used. Unfortunately some kid's don't get access to proper facilities and lack of resources in some area's unable them to improve necessary social skills.. That seems to be the case where I live.

I think behaviour in Kids with Special Needs is a challenge in itself. I myself have learned to create different ways of coping with my kids. The difficult thing I have found is both my kids have totally different behavioural patterns, obsessions , rituals and personalities. Sometimes it's very hard to try and deal with each child especially when they both require attention at the same time. When arriving home from school, my two kids are very hyper and they both want to tell you something that has happened at school, I wish I had two lots of ears so I could listen to what they were both saying at the same time. For my Chloe getting in from school is a time when all hell brakes loose and my eldest daughter Katie run's for cover to escape violent outbursts from her sister. These outburst usually occur when she has had a bad day at school. We put it down to overload. Katie would manage to have a conversation when Chloe is tucked up in bed for the night.

Coping through the Tantrums and Outbursts (not easy)
This a very frustrating time for any Parent, Carer, Grandparent, and the siblings of the family..
Being in a public setting is a challenge, at the local shopping centre, either to many people around or too noisy or perhaps the sizes of the shops themselves all can pose a problem when wanting to carry out tasks which we all take for granted. But having a child with Autism makes the simplest of tasks impossible in some cases. We ourselves have been asked "why cant she stay at home then we can enjoy ourselves for once" Which has been a typical comment made by one of my children, about their sister. Another comment used is why? is she always screaming and crying and why? does she always want to watch the same T.V programme, the usual answer is because she is obsessive an ritualistic, and cant help what she is doing. It is a difficult time for Siblings. The above questions are frequently asked by my daughter, who's sister is under diagnosis for an autistic spectrum disorder..

We also have a son who is diagnosed with severe A.D.H.D, Tourettes Syndrome/Tics and newly diagnosed O.C.D as well as an Autistic Spectrum Disorder. He can be very off putting when we are having visitors at our home, because he cant control his noises, and can be very moody and hard to deal with at times. Especially when we are out at the supermarket, he likes to run up and down the aisles, and we always know where he is because of his noises, we do get people staring at him, of which he is also aware of. But he doesn't care what people think when he is enjoying himself. We have found that in our local area people can be ignorant and see him as a nuisance, mostly because they have no knowledge or simply don't want to know. Although we do find ourselves telling him to calm down but he cant always do this..

Just below I have put some information, about my daughter Chloe who is under diagnosis for an Autistic Spectrum Disorder,

This page is an important part of my website, because I think that behaviour difficulties, with children, with conditions mentioned on the site vary,from child to child. I would like to talk about my daughter Chloe, she has been under diagnosis for an Autistic Spectrum Disorder now since 1999. It all started back when she was 3yrs. As a baby she was the most demanding baby, anyone could have had. She constantly cried (This started from birth) and continues till now..
She was overdue, I was 41 weeks when I had her, but I wasn't able to see her straight after her birth, like normally the baby is placed on your stomach, then the bonding process starts, which is a very special time. I later found out 20 minutes later that she was not breathing properly, and this was known as a shock birth. Eventually my Chloe was handed to me and I was just so glad that everything was okay and I was allowed to see my baby at last.. But I found it difficult to understand why she didn't stop crying. The doctor said that it was because it was a shock birth and she will settle in 72 hours or so?How wrong could he have been. I found that feeding her was the most challenging time, and trying to hold and cuddle her was difficult as well. I just plodded along and hoped it was a phase she would grow out of. It was especially difficult when she was around 12 months of age when we had family members visit with their kid's, Chloe just didn't acknowledge them. And when her cousins wanted to play with her she would just act as if they weren't there. I would sit down and try and get into a conversation with them, Chloe had a dislike to this. The funny thing was that I think that was the only time Chloe ever came to me for cuddles and would sit on my knee for the whole time my family visited. If anyone was to approach Chloe she would hide away pressing herself tightly to me. Without ever looking to see who was there. After my family left she would climb down and start to play again as if nothing had happened. Her behaviour has always been a challenge in itself. After all the problems I had encountered with her she was referred to a paedatrition for investigation. After that she had some assessments done by a psychologist, and then a speech therapist. She is still seeing the specialist now, till we can find out what the problem is and sort it..(One day soon )

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